Spike: You don’t suppose you and I…we’re not related, are we?
Anya: There is a ruggedly handsome resemblance.
Giles: And you do inspire a particular feeling of…familiarity and…disappointment. Older brother?
Spike: Father. Oh god, how I must hate you.
Giles: What did I do?
Spike: Oh, there’s always something.
—-
Spike: Oh great, a tarty stepmom who’s half old daddy’s age.
Anya: Tarty?
Giles: Old? You little twerp, I’m young enough to still get carded!
—-
Giles: I’m called Rupert Giles.
Spike: Rupert! (giggles)
Giles: You’re not too old to put across my knee, you know. Anyway, what did I call you?
Spike: Um. (checks the suit) “Made with care for Randy”. Randy Giles?! Why not just call me “Horny Giles” or “Desperate for a shag Giles”? I knew there was a reason I hated you!
—-
Buffy: Any suggestions on how we’re gonna get out of here?
Spike: Dad can drive. He’s bound to have some classic midlife-crisis transport. Something red, shiny, shaped like a penis.
—-
Giles: Um, son. Come here. Um, please.
Spike: Um…
Giles: Yes, um…
(awkward hug)
Spike: Right.
Giles: Good, then.
Top 5 Tabula Rasa Moments | 1. Spike and Giles as akward father and son
Spike: I must be a noble vampire. A good guy. On a mission of redemption. I help the hopeless. I’m a vampire with a soul.
Buffy: A vampire with a soul? God, How lame is that?
Top 5 Tabula Rasa Moments | 2. A vampire with a soul
